I never meant to be so screwed up,
I never meant to have a mind full of fuck.
I only wanted happy in my life
why was that so much to ask?
All my life, I’ve been put down,
I get judged without uttering a sound.
I tried to look but could never find
someone to help me, someone to show me
before the knives get stuck in my back
Family was useless, they never cared.
Sometimes they would even join in
Make me feel more worthless than anyone else.
People are all talk but never lend a hand
to someone never allowed to know.
Constantly in the dark, the way they like it.
I never wanted to be this way,
I wanted to sing, dance, and play.
See the world was top on my list,
Inspire and create and live life til I’m full.
So much time passed with these dark clouds over head,
Too old now to do all I dreamed.
I knew what I wanted to be from the time I was three
But never was I allowed to ever be.
Never had been shown a way out so I’m stuck.
I know these words may not make sense to most and not exactly my normal poetic prose, but they are what is in my head at the moment like it or not. Sometimes I just need to get it out no matter how the words decide to fall.